Okay, you heard me rant and gripe about my first day of Blissdom, not about the conference itself (it was amazing) but about the way I felt personally. I am, unfortunately, my own worst enemy, I know all of my flaws and weaknesses. And apparently I’ve gotten into a really bad habit of bashing myself in public.
Friday evening I had the privilege of spending some time with a childhood friend and blogger, Laura of Hollywood Housewife. We attended the Harry Connick Jr. concert together, and caught up on the happenings of our lives from the last few years or so. The concert was nice, and Harry Connick Jr lived up to his reputation, no doubt. During and after the concert, numerous ladies approached my friend and complimented her beautiful dress, understandably so, it was darling. After the first couple of mentions of her dress, I started to feel invisible, and not so glamorous. After all, I had on jeans and heels, and a simple Banana Republic top, no designer dress, just something you might find on the average gal from the Southwest. Now right now a disclaimer, no harm intended towards Laura at all, she’s sweet, and a dear friend, and it wasn’t her fault that everyone and their dog decided to approach her about her dress.
So, somewhere between the 4th and 98th compliment that Laura’s dress received, I started spouting off snide remarks and comments. Of course, these comments were of the jealous, insecure variety, and totally unacceptable on my part. I started to feel unimportant, and like a frumpy housewife. Instead of being happy for my friend, and glad for the “conversation piece” that her dress had become, I became the crazy jealous psycho. The whole incident sounds humorous, but it wasn’t, it was ridiculous that I acted like such an immature brat!
I’m sure I could come up with numerous excuses to explain my behavior, I missed my kids, I was tired, I was overwhelmed, etc. But I have to face the music on this one, it was me, this incident has opened my eyes to my actions and attitudes. AND, I am ready to move forward and work on my self-esteem. I WILL be happy in my life, my self, and my family, and lifestyle. So, if you were one of the unfortunate victims of my rather rude comments, then I sincerely apologize, and ask forgiveness. And specifically I apologize to Laura for putting her through my antics, besides it wasn’t her fault that she had such a darn cute dress. :)
More on Blissdom later……
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
WOW…that was so brave! I’m so sorry you felt less than.
Beth Moore does a bible study on Esther that is all about how when we feel ourselves rail up against another woman it is most likely because of our OWN issues…
(((hugs)))
So where’s a picture of this dress, lol!
I’m sure it wasn’t as bad as you think it was in your mind.
Liz! You are beautiful and kind and adorable! I love YOU… the you you are… snide remarks and all (cause I’m JUST like ya!). Don’t beat yourself up… okay? Please?!?!?
I lurves you! xoxoxoxo
I soooo wish I had had a chance to meet you at BlissDom.
I hate feeling invisible. I LOVE that you understand why you felt that way & take ownership. It’s part of growing….and you, my dear, are!
Forgiveness is golden. Walk away with a clean slate and start anew.
Sedning love your way!
Lizzy Dear,
I was glad to have met you, Laura, and The Dress!! ~Chris Ann
I must apologize for I am definitely one of the “dress stalkers”! I was stalking down fancy things for my Blissdom Fancy Friday post and that dress was a stand out!! Little did I know that Laura aka Hollywood Housewife was wearing it ~ (which was a fun surprise as we had met online in the previous weeks!!) And, that Dear Lizzy allowed me to have the pleasure of meeting you! You were very helpful to me about what you do with ads and the business part of the blog and I was glad that I got a chance to talk to you!! Don’t be too hard on yourself!!
…and I didn’t even notice the damn dress. LOL Besides this I am glad we had a great time together. The conversation was amazing with you and I enjoyed every minute of it and we had LOTS of MINUTES!
Lol Very True!! Many minutes, and more to come!
Of all the time I spent with you at BlogHer last year, I mainly remember three things.
1. You discredit yourself a lot.
2. You are absolutely beautiful.
3. You are fun and interesting and fabulous.
I hope you will work on your self esteem, whether it’s through self exploration or a book or a therapist. The rest of us know how awesome you are, and I hope you’re able to see it, too.